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‘Fast forward to when we began dating, I initiated the conversation about having herpes and asked him if he remembered. He loves me and that’s all that matters.’ When is the best time to let a potential partner know that you’re carrying the herpes virus?Alexandra says that it depends on who you are and what you want from the relationship.Condom use doesn’t guarantee protection from herpes, as they don’t always cover the entire affected area of the sufferer and there can still be skin to skin contact around the exposed region.
‘When I found out I had herpes, I had to go back to the office and when I walked in, he asked me what was wrong. He told me that everything will be ok and that he considered me family so if there is anything I ever needed, I should call him.
Or sometimes people just want to lay it all out on the table to weed out prospects.
‘Others prefer to take their time, to see if they really like the other person and to make sure they want to be in a relationship.
‘We ran a survey of our members asking how many potential partners they had talked to about this – and how often they were rejected.
There was an 83% acceptance rate for both men and women, meaning that fewer than 1 in 5 partners wanted to discontinue the relationship.’ However, the risk of transmitting the disease is always present.
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It was very hard to tell a guy I liked that I had herpes, hoping that they would still want to date me.’ Alexandra also admits that she has used the ‘herpes card’ to her advantage if there was someone she didn’t want to have sex with.